the other side

i dreamt about mak this morning.

after sahur, i'll usually chat with buncit for a while before going back to sleep. yes, i must tido balik. sleep is never enough for me you see. so then, for the past 4 nights my after sahur slumber were dreamless because i macam conked out sungguh.

jadi when i dreamt about mak this morning, it felt so surreal. macam she's still at the opposite block waiting to wave me off at the tingkap at 7.30am every morning. and yes, i still have the habit of looking at her window each morning on the way to the mrt station, just a wee bit expecting her to be there...to wave me off.

i am so terok at accepting goodbyes.

okay the dream. mak was still like the old mak i remembered. siap with t-shirt, kain batik and pinned-up hair yang takde orang in our family tau buat. we were in her kitchen, her territory tau. she hated anyone who messes her kitchen period and atok was usually her nagging victim, heh. so anyways, pardon me for the sidetrack, mak and i was cooking something i think (i can't really remember now that i've got to type it word for word), i was doing the dishes, she was at the stove. when for no apparent reason, she just came up to me to give this rib-crunching hug. it was teramat touching tau.

i think mak missed me as much as i missed her. because you see, each ramadhan, i will without fail ask her to cook her speciality, laksa and ayam masak merah. and now that she's gone, i guess it's time for me to learn how to cook those dishes myself.

hah, like as if.